FOMO. It is real. For some of us anyways. And it tends to rear it’s ugly head most often during conferences, missions trips, parties, or wherever your friends happen to be having a blast together.

And it’s so enticing:

Time is precious!

They’re probably having so much fun!

Hot seat? Life chats? Telephone pictionary? Can’t miss that!

These classic excuses get me everytime. But one thing we should all learn: quality of connecting is so much more important than mere quantity of connecting.

Yes, you need a certain amount of time with someone to really connect (especially if you really need quality time). But what good is that time if you enter and leave it feeling exhausted? If you’re in dire need of alone time, are you really going to be able to be YOU during telephone pictionary or deep chats? Like with your favourite toys or your cell phone, you need to charge the batteries if you want to play.

I’ve learned this about myself: When I’m tired, it doesn’t really matter if I’m “where the action is” if I don’t have the capacity to enjoy that action.

The truth is simple: Some nights it’s just more productive (and wise) to stay at home and allow emotional and physical energy levels to recharge.

Now for some of you, this idea is crazy. You may be a huge extrovert and perhaps you just have lots of energy. Awesome! This might not apply to you; at least not now. But for the rest of us, we could drastically be improving our lives, relationships, and fun if we knew when to hold back and when to dive in to social times.

I’ll be honest, I don’t want this idea to be over-applied. Introverts (myself included) too often use it as an excuse to avoid people and neglect engaging in community. Sometimes, even when you’re tired, the most helpful option is sacrificial and servant hearted socializing or other community involvement. Stretch yourself out a bit. Kind of like a social work out, if you will.

But if you think you might be doing yourself or others more harm than good by going… feel absolutely free to hold back this time and let tomorrow be better for it.

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About the Author

Corey Sleep

Corey graduated from McMaster University in Kinesiology but in the end couldn’t resist a call to ministry. He now works with Power to Change – Students dividing his time between campus ministry and creating blog and other content. You can check out his personal blog at

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